I hate the guy with the bluetooth headset

Meet Smitty. He's a total cocksucker -- one of the worst classifications of asshole attainable. One really must work hard to be a cocksucker. Not only is Smitty a cocksucker, he's a bluetooth-headset wearing cocksucker which makes it even worse.

Smitty is a type-A motherfucker who breaks for no one. He's a stockbroker for some chop shop firm that specializes in losing peoples money All of his co-workers hate his guts.

Smitty probably lives in the ATL, rents a luxury apartment, and drives a Nissan Z. He's all about image. He dates skanks, loves strip clubs, is loud, boorish and obnoxious which is never more apparent than when he strolls around with his brand spanking new bluetooth headset on for all of us lesser people to see.

Smitty wears his device like a badge. When he's not sell overperforming stocks to suckers, Smitty's ususally shooting the shit with his fantasy football buddies doubtless trying to come to terms on which bar on any given night will have the most pussy. You'll you know that Smitty has a bluetooth headset since he'll be talking louder than ever person in the room, especially when all is reletively quiet, like at the post office. By the time you've mailed you package, you know this about Smitty: 1.) he would have shot 4 over but the course he played the other day was total bullshit. 2.) he made a killing off that IPO last month and 3.)tonight is the 3rd date with Kaylie and if he doesn't get some ass, he's cutting bait.

It is unfortunate that we have to tolerate cocksuckers like Smitty, much less a jackass with a walkie-talkie in his ears who talks to himself louder than an inmate at the asylum. For all his arrogance and bravado, Smitty earns his spot as the asshole of the week.

Asshole Level: Cocksuker