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Tuesday, October 25, 2005

I hate minced garlic

Can anyone please tell me why a restaurant would want to add profane amounts of minced garlic their board of fare? Is it because it's cheap? Do people really like it or do they just have hemorrhoids for tastebuds?

I don't mind a bit of fresh garlic thrown in to spice up Mexican or Italian, but this jar full of minced ass doesn't do food any favors. I would like to appeal to all chefs out there to try and cook with some herbs and spices other than garlic if for no other reason than to demonstrate that you can actually create flavor using the main ingredients.

I must admit that part of my distaste for garlic in a jar stems from a bachelor party from which I was fortunately absent. The whole affair was a bunch of dudes cooped up in a cabin somewhere playing truth or dare, the kind of place that friends of mcdougals friends would be really happy. Anyway, one of the dares was for the bachelor in question to eat an entire wholesale club-sized jar of minced garlic. To his credit, he nailed the entire jar, juice and all. I heard second hand from his now wife that he stank for weeks from the garlic seeping out of his pours. The though of smelling like garlic for a week makes my huzz. Anyway, I fucking hate jarred garlic.

3 Comments:

Blogger Robert A. Ganoosh said...

Really scraping the bottom of the barrel here, huh Gumby?

8:05 PM

 
Blogger Astro said...

hindsight being what it is I should probably be more discriminating in my posts, but with an audience of 3, I figured WTF.

Now if you'll excuse me while I get my shit straight and start hatin' again.

4:55 AM

 
Blogger Unknown said...

Couldn't agree more..that is unless you include garlic in all its vicious forms.
It is a sign that a chef has no clue what they are doing in the kitchen. Fuck up a dish? Well just add garlic and *BAM* you are have a passable dinner. Assuming the victim enjoys garlic that is.
Garlic too often overpowers ALL other flavors. It is offensive during the dinner as well as hours after. And have you ever smelled a garlic fart. I could cry just thinking about it.
Down with garlic- That oblnoxious fucking bulb.
If you want anti-viral and anti-bacterial properties try basil or ginger. I don't know why garlicgets most of the credit for it??

2:01 PM

 

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